OPRAAAAH

"CHICAGO – An embarrassed Oprah Winfrey says she's "fallen off the wagon" of healthy living and has ballooned to 200 pounds.

In January's "O" magazine, Winfrey, 54, details her recent struggles with an out-of-balance thyroid and how the condition made her develop "a fear of working out." She says she's gained 40 pounds since 2006, when she weighed 160."

If an "out-balance thyroid" means late night trips to the South Side to appropriate a bucket of Harold's Chicken garnished by fluffy slices of white bread and brown gravy, then yes Oprah, you have an "out of balance thyroid" and a "fear of working out."

But that's not fair to Oprah, she is being painfully honest and I am being a bitch. But these sorts of things happen to people both when they do and do not think they are God's gift to humanity, and I think Oprah falls in former of those two categories.