Mix and match

Through my experiment, I’ve decided that match.com is blow-gus, just so you know. You’ll get all these messages, and then you’ll wonder which intriguing or desperate local has sent you a message. But then! You can’t look at the message until you pay a subscription fee. Screw you online matchmaker, I have my devilish good charms that draw people to me, even if those people generally live in storm drains.